Texts From Last Night

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  (225): View more from Louisiana

  i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels

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  (225): i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels http://tfl.nu/zg26
  Replies (58) Good night (1001) Bad night (8363)
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  (845): View more from New York

  that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...

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  (845): that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before... http://tfl.nu/0j29
  Replies (23) Good night (6299) Bad night (1362)
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  (516): View more from New York

  we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan

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  (516): we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan http://tfl.nu/uipi
  Replies (16) Good night (5787) Bad night (1160)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.

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  (706): I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life. http://tfl.nu/uth4
  Replies (20) Good night (1629) Bad night (4226)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.

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  (480): Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea. http://tfl.nu/itom
  Replies (2) Good night (2820) Bad night (1144)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?

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  (717): Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear? http://tfl.nu/yvgn
  Replies (3) Good night (1259) Bad night (833)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.

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  (617): I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area. http://tfl.nu/k7xx
  Replies (4) Good night (1425) Bad night (1377)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.

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  (417): It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday. http://tfl.nu/s40o
  Replies (15) Good night (2518) Bad night (686)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!

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  (814): i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen! http://tfl.nu/wf7b
  Replies (1) Good night (1074) Bad night (415)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home

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  (920): We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home http://tfl.nu/c2b2
  Replies (3) Good night (830) Bad night (456)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing

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  (218): My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing http://tfl.nu/4jwd
  Replies (0) Good night (518) Bad night (411)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.

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  (202): Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT. http://tfl.nu/ohed
  Replies (5) Good night (843) Bad night (478)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..

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  (315): I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together.. http://tfl.nu/z4t0
  Replies (1) Good night (657) Bad night (330)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals

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  (413): He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals http://tfl.nu/hgzz
  Replies (4) Good night (1171) Bad night (570)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  It was so small.

  (1-603): View more from New Hampshire

  Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.

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  (603): It was so small. (1-603): Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way. http://tfl.nu/witd
  Replies (5) Good night (378) Bad night (522)

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