There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
These 25 Teachers Said Horrible Things to Their Students
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
21 Millennials Confess The Most Awkward Way Someone Has Tried Hitting On Them
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.