My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
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