he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize