Just cropdusted the office
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Randomize