Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.