Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
