so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
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