if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Randomize
