...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...