So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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