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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.

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• (646): View more from New York

  But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.

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  27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (510): View more from California

  according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  She seemed pretty into it.

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• (801): View more from Utah

  That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.

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  23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (937): View more from Ohio

  Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.

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• (310): View more from California

  you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer

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• (925): View more from California

  Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?

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• (585): View more from New York

  There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?

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