I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
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