I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
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