dude i'm inner monologue high
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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