Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
