College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
i think im in europe. pls send help
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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