You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.