I love black thongs
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
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