K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.