How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"