just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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