Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize