Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
My ATM looks so different sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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