He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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