he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
honey bunches of taint.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???