remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
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