I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Randomize
