I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
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