did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize