On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
