No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
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He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
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my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.