I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize