I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.