i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.