Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
