My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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