Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
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I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
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