I need help removing her.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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