You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize