I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
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