My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
my being single is dangerous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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