I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
found the other keg... it's in the tree
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I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
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Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
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