im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Randomize