I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
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