He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
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you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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