Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize