I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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