You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Randomize
