dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame