Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
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